I had lost faith in women in general and become reclusive many a times!

I was a person who remained timid and shy at heart in spite of being a sporty person at school who never went into any close relationship with any girls as I considered it to be not a part of my life. As it is said that it all happens through genetic thoughts and as far as I remember me with my family which was a cute small one where we were only four of us( which has been repeated often in my blogs) including my father, mother, sister and me and no intrusion of any special school friends at home which has made no rift in my life.

The father who was a strict disciplinarian never got into any sort of sexual words before any woman coming to our house and most of the time remain quiet with all the dirty damsels who are called the Bhabhi, Mausi, and Chachi as he was much interested in my mother's cooking abilities and since we had the privilege of staying in two-room house throughout the birth I never saw them getting into sexual intonation but the family was satisfied as mother and father stayed in the other room and our brother and sister have our own room which could be our own personal space. 

I was less inclined towards women in the neighborhood and my tuition teachers also knew the strictness of my father due to which there was less of the thought to prevail in mind which could be seen in cheap behaviour of students from Hindi and Saraswati Medium schools which are not the right place for education as such medium students do not have an open mind and most of the time they are found to indulge in various sexual activities and turn into lowly jobs. To be very frank such students never has an open mind and throughout their life, they have the same thought in mind of fucking the neighborhood girls due to which such pressure could be seen on the face of the girl as well as the mother, father and various other people in society.

In any case, such a person grow in life they try to rob away your happiness and make you feel small before others by telling all negative or positive scenarios of your life in the most sexist and negative intonations which shows the cruelty of the mind and some of could be the jailbirds who try to threaten the society at large and thus make the life hell for other educated people who are worth for the society.

 Now, talking about the statement which says "I had lost faith in women in general and become reclusive many times"! is true to me and it does not happen because of the traits of less masculinity as in my earlier relationship I was sexually O.K. and still the woman left the home. To be very frank the reason is all about the region from where she used to belong. Since I never indulge in any kind of promiscuous relationship people considered my well-mannered thought process to be a taboo and I could not find any girl who could match my level of thinking and standards as I was taught by some school great teachers who were very fluent in English and were of very high moral standards which is all according to the society as they have seen the better and the worse of the society.

My way of life was to be more near towards my teachers and never cross their path in the wrong manner without making them feel bad about me. If anybody meets my teacher from Holy Cross, they will come to know about my well-mannered upbringing where I was jovial but not Jackal with thoughts.

So, when I reach New Delhi the often different cases was observed by me where the woman who use to people as tenants tried to harass the men folks but as my thought process remained the same of standing tall in my own eyes I never took any path of getting nude before any woman in my room which was all about maintaining my dignity and inner self. The same was about my office which was about my joining into various capabilities at different offices but not getting into touchy-feely with any woman thus making me a different person altogether in their eyes.

When I got married I never tried to get into the mold of marrying a super-rich woman but tried to get married to a woman from my ancestral village and there all the problems started to occur which lead to my sufferings  and my tears making me feel cry as she was total of the different mindset where her sense of freedom has an awkward sense which should not be talked about in general.

So, when I stayed with my sister near Safdarjung where she was into a training period of Hotel Management by Pusa Road Institute by Indian Agricultural Research Institute which is the prime and Government Recognised Hotel Institute, I still carried a better legacy of big brother and was strict but after she got into the upper scale business environment I went into my own studies which have remained due in life and thus at today's lifestyle I find myself to be matching steps with the current generation.

So, it makes me wary before getting into any relationship as my frequency matches a different level of mind and even if I stay alone it never hurts me because I do not believe in having one-night stand and then moving on but with the woman leaving me who was not from the educated background I feel more relaxed in my life and it makes me happier rather than feeling bad about it thus making me go for the ultimate goal of life to get ahead into various Marathon running as I was a runner of cross-country competition every year held at my school which was Holy Cross School, Bokaro Steel City.